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The differences between us..

I think I'm realising why the house is so messy and why I feel so lazy and frustrated all the time.

Housework done by me yesterday
Dishwasher loaded and emptied twice
Washing hung on line and brought in when dry
Spare room cleared
Dinner prepared
Cake baked
Cats fed twice

Housework done by the boy yesterday
Dinner served (I was watching Eastenders :p)
Cats fed once
Spare room cleared (he did more than me because much of it was heavy boxes and furniture moving)

To be honest I have no idea how much he'd do if he wasn't nagged, I don't take that risk ;) Seems very unfair as we're both on holiday and both work full time and while the dishwasher and laundry seem to have turned into my jobs somewhere along the way, his jobs like cleaning the kitchen only get done once every few months (I feel sick when I go in there.. little lumps of dried on cat food everywhere.. mud and grass all over the floor..) I hate cleaning the kitchen so I'm not going to just do it, I'm going to make him do it :p He only seems to clean when people come over, and never cleans just for me :(
Anyway, I think I'm due a nice lazy day today while himself does all the sanding and painting! Muahaha.
We're both going to my midwife appointment at 11, slightly nervous about this because I've only taken Stu to 2 appointments with me before but I cried both times. It seems like a bad omen. I can't think of anything I've got to cry about today though, I've got nothing to bring up with her at all. But he wants to come and I'd like him to come too, to hear the heartbeat and maybe hear what position the baby's lying in and everything (I can't work it out, I know sometimes a hard lump sticks out of my left side, but I also feel movement on my left side and in the middle, down low where it hurt :p Perhaps that's the two arms? Hmm)
Anyway off for breakfast, boiled-to-death egg and toast :)

Comments

( 39 comments — Leave a comment )
lavendersblue
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:06 am (UTC)
doesn't it suck not being able to have yummy runny eggs? : (

lemmee know how your appointment goes hon : )
seren
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:12 am (UTC)
Yes it bloody does, warm hard boiled eggs are not the same! :(
I'll post about it in my baby journal. Im quite nervous today for some reason!
lavendersblue
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:15 am (UTC)
aww don't be, everything is bound to be just fine : ) still it's natural to be nervous, i'm always bricking it before an appointment!
seren
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:25 am (UTC)
I worry for ages before mine but when she says everything's looking great, it's such a nice feeling! :)
Better pluck my stomach before I go actually :P I think I'd rather the hairs had kept growing at normal rate on my legs than have to deal with hairs on my stomach! Not that I can see the worst bit any more. Argh!
lavendersblue
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:27 am (UTC)
-snickers- oh the joys of what i have to look forward to heheheh...
seren
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:35 am (UTC)
OK do you not have that then? I think mine started a while ago. It's not that bad, just a few jet black hairs under my belly button :P I know its not just me because lots of people on my forums mention them (one girl had it waxed!!)
lavendersblue
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:48 am (UTC)
yeha i hear it can get -really- bad, i don't have it yet though thankfully i also don't have that weird dark line that pregnant woman get either! still i bet i have -all- that to some and more....feh!
seren
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:50 am (UTC)
I have the weird dark line :D I can't see that part of my belly but I saw it in the changing rooms in Mothercare. It's not that dark, just like a dodgy tan colour really
lavendersblue
Apr. 28th, 2004 02:01 am (UTC)
i'm not sure if i'll get iyt owrse or hardly at all because i'm naturally nilk bottle white in colour...

talking of mothercare, weird question i know but do yu ahve any idea as to whether you can exchange bras? i know you cna't exchange kncikers and such but i bought another maternity bra yesterday, not even taken it out of the box only to find out after measuring myself that i need a bigger one : (
seren
Apr. 28th, 2004 02:18 am (UTC)
I think you can, Im not sure though. Maybe their website says?
seren
Apr. 28th, 2004 02:20 am (UTC)
Argh I just spent AGES replying to your email but its been blocked because I swore :P ARGH! I didnt keep the sent mail either :(
lavendersblue
Apr. 28th, 2004 02:35 am (UTC)
*LMFAO!!!!!* omg.... that's awful : ( -hits e-mail- i'm sued to tempramental computers so i always ctr+alt ctr+c everything before i send be it a comment or an e-mail.

i forgot we had filters...i thought it only filtered outgoing not incoming!!!
seren
Apr. 28th, 2004 02:46 am (UTC)
It wont get you in trouble will it?
lavendersblue
Apr. 28th, 2004 02:47 am (UTC)
nah not at all lol.
lavendersblue
Apr. 28th, 2004 02:48 am (UTC)
besides i think it just bounces it so they don't actually see who to and who from it gets blocked before it gets anywhere based off of a list of 'nonono!' words
seren
Apr. 28th, 2004 03:37 am (UTC)
I hope you're right :) There was a lot of faff in our office about email at Christmas, someone had forwarded round a jokey rude picture, and he was suspended for a month! One of the temps forwarded it as well and he was kicked out. About 4 people got formal written warnings because they'd forwarded it to someone outside Ofsted. They're still going on about it now, it takes the piss :/ I've been paranoid to use my email ever since incase they're spying on everything!!
lavendersblue
Apr. 28th, 2004 03:55 am (UTC)
ahh theyr'e like that here but it woudl only come in to effect if i -sent- something offensive / inappropiate or forwarded it
tiggsybabes
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:14 am (UTC)
I can be smug now as Andy is a very good housewife, though he doesn't do as much tidying as I'd like, but he does cook, wash up, wash clothes, hoover & clean the bathroom.

My ex husband was supposed to do half the housework as we both worked & in the end I paid for a cleaner as I was fed up with spending the whole of the weekend cleaning.

She left the island after a couple of years & we went back into chaos. He used to go & use the wedding present cut crystal glasses rather than wash the every day glasses. When it was his turn to wash up, he would let it pile up until every single plate, cup, knife, fork etc was in a big pile next to the sink. He would buy new clothes rather than wash anything. He left coffee cups on his bedside cabinet until they were rancid.

In the last year of us living together, I just got fed up with it & towards the end, I stopped doing housework too. My parents popped around one Sunday & were in shock at the state of the lounge. My dad took me out for a walk with the dog & my mum cleaned it. I was in bed with real flu (twice, poor me) & my mum came round each afternoon & cleaned & cooked me a meal as my ex was too busy. After I had left him, he wanted me back & told me that I needed to buck up my ideas about housework & go back to doing it all again!

Sorry, right, moan over.

I think the best way is to talk about it, write down all the jobs that need doing & split them. I hate putting clothes away, so Andy does most of that. I don't actually mind washing up (if it's only a sensible amount) so I do most of that. etc.

Give & take I guess.

He will have to do more as you won't be able to do as much physcially soon & after the birth. I couldn't hoover for a about a month afterwards as it was too heavy on my scar.
seren
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:34 am (UTC)
Awww bless him :) Stu cooks sometimes, loads the dishwasher sometimes.. and he does hoover and clean the kitchen. But nowhere near as often as I'd like :/
Your ex sounds like a nightmare! Stu isn't that bad.. he used to be when he lived with a man though, there was never anything to eat off and they didn't even scrape the leftover food off their plates before leaving it for 3 weeks to rot :( There were some vile things in that house, I can't believe nobody got ill from living there!
we also don't put clothes away, they mound up for about a month and then get taken upstairs and thrown in a pile of cat hair on the floor. I can't actually get to my section of the wardrobe or my drawers at the moment due to all the junk from the spare room blocking the way.. so am living our of baskets :/
I'm just as lazy and selective about what I do I guess, but at least I do things every day and without nagging.
The other day I made my rolls and took them in to work. At lunchtime I was eating them and noticed a lump of brown jelly on my finger. At first I thought "what the hell is this in the tuna" and then it dawned on me that it was jelly from cat food.. as usual Stu had fed them in the morning and left lumps of jelly lying everywhere, and I'd dared to just put my wrapped rolls down on a surface for 5 minutes before putting them in my bag! I told him and he thought it was hilarious.. I thought it was horrible :(
crunchie
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:15 am (UTC)
Josh is the same, he won't do something unless I ask him to, and if he's not in a position to do it at that moment, he'll "forget" about it, and I have to ask him again later, and it makes it look like I'm nagging him. Which I am, I guess, as it's the only way to get him to help me!
tiggsybabes
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:17 am (UTC)
I worked out that nagging never works & FLYlady says to do it yourself rather than nag. Stuff that! I write out a list & pin it up with what I want us both to do, so Andy does do it when he has free time.
seren
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:20 am (UTC)
No, sod that! I'm not doing it myself, that's what got my mother into the mess she's in, cleaning up blobs of mayonnaise after my dad when he's made a sandwich because he thinks he doesn't have to do anything!
tiggsybabes
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:27 am (UTC)
I can see FLYlady's reasoning & it's that if you set a good example, then the rest of the family will automatically do more. It certainly didn't work with my ex!
seren
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:36 am (UTC)
No, didn't work for my mum either! :P
seren
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:27 am (UTC)
I wonder if Stu thinks Im going to do all the cooking and cleaning when I'm at home with the baby, I bet he does. I imagine it's even harder to do when you're entertaining a baby 24/7! I've already told him he'll have to take the baby for a while when he gets in most nights so I can get stuff done :p
crunchie
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:35 am (UTC)
That's just what happens here, I let Josh get in the house, get changed and then I crack on with washing the breakfast and lunch time dishes as I haven't had a chance to do them all day and they just pile up!
seren
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:38 am (UTC)
Thank god for dishwashers :)
tiggsybabes
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:36 am (UTC)
I am supposed to now be a full time housewife & I would do all the housework in Kate's nursery times if I was up to it. I certainly wouldn't do it all if I had her with me all day every day. I'm not doing it now either as have half tidied the lounge & feel light headed & sick. I've stripped the bed too in anticipation of the new mattress. Doubt I'll be up to making it again. Andy can do that this evening.
seren
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:39 am (UTC)
Making big beds is impossible, it's a man's job ;)
tiggsybabes
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:49 am (UTC)
I've always hated putting duvet covers on. I tend to leave it for Andy to do anyway *g*
seren
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:52 am (UTC)
My duvet is now bigger than me (6 ft wide and however long they usually are) so I have a good excuse not to do it. It might eat me!
tiggsybabes
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:16 am (UTC)
I missed the bit about your appointment. Andy came t0 1 with me as he was at home (I forget whay now) He was fascinated by the heartbeat & the mw showed him how to work out where the baby was lying & how to identify which bit was poking out :)
seren
Apr. 28th, 2004 01:20 am (UTC)
ooh I hope mine does that. she didnt seem to know herself last time, apparently i dont have a very feely baby! :|
crunchie
Apr. 28th, 2004 02:34 am (UTC)
Better pluck my stomach before I go actually

I still have this to do. :-/
I used to have blondey hairs on my neck too, no one could see them, only me, but thankfully they've almost gone now, just the odd one. I don't half feel like a freak!
seren
Apr. 28th, 2004 04:34 am (UTC)
I think it's all normal! I did wonder if it was related to testosterone and carrying baby boys but then people who are carrying baby girls proved me wrong ;)
clydiebaby
Apr. 28th, 2004 08:32 pm (UTC)
My best friend jokes all the time that she has a revolutionary cleaning system that keeps her home spotless all the time...

She stays out ;)
seren
Apr. 29th, 2004 01:25 am (UTC)
Ah, but when you have cats, that doesn't work ;)
clydiebaby
Apr. 29th, 2004 05:28 pm (UTC)
She has cats too, but they are cleaner than she is!
seren
Apr. 30th, 2004 02:26 am (UTC)
Wow, can I swap my cats for her cats?!
( 39 comments — Leave a comment )

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